Fear tells a story...

The story of fear has everything to do with what we want.

When we want something badly enough, our desire makes us weak. Imagine me wanting your designer watch. I will do anything to get that watch, which makes me manipulable by you (it may also make me dangerous to you if I have criminal tendencies). I become manageble by you. I may even trade my agenda for yours. I do what you want of me, for fear of not getting what I want or think I need from you. Translate 'designer watch' for a regular salary, security, acceptance, friendship, power, a cosy job...

I allowed my life to be ruled by fear...

Until fairly recently, my life was ruled by that same fear. I was afraid of what people would think of me if I did not make a success (read excess- money) of my life. Who will look after me when I cannot work (when I fail to take care of someone else's agenda)? What will happen if I get seriously ill? How will I be able to afford my insurance premiums, car installment, dentist account, electricity bill? Will my friends leave me?

We all have these fears and they are important. The question is how important. Is my need or want the most important thing in the world? Should it be?

We all start off thinking so. For a baby, his needs are everything. A baby needs food, warmth, affection, cleansing- and he needs it NOW. He's not interested in the comfort of his caretaker: everything is for his own agenda.

When he grows up a bit, he starts to understand that everyone else is not primarily there to cater only for him. The child learns that to get what he wants, he has to give sometimes: a hug, a 'I love you, mother', a smile, offering to wash the car for extra pocket money. When I buy, I expect to pay.

Later on we may become parents ourselves. We then learn to give to the child unconditionally. A mature person has grown emotionally into a big person, compared to the child. We understand that big persons are there to care for and empower the small one to become what s/he is: mature. In the pattern of life children grow up to become parents. One does not raise children: one raises parents. In the eyes of children parents are powerful givers.

Life teaches that givers are big and powerful. It also shows up takers for what they really are: small and needy. The needy are manipulable because of their fear of not getting or winning or appearing important, while contributors are free to be powerfully inspiring the lives of others. Love becomes the biggest motivator, for the emotionally mature has nothing to loose.

Does love have a function in business? 

Who would you do anything for? I bet for the love of your life. Love is the greatest motivator on earth. If we love our job, we will excell in it. If we love the company (culture) we wouldn't want to not be there and contribute to its success. When we love our customers, they would do anything to do business with us. Love is irresistible. It leaves no option. It forces a positive response.

Powerful organisations give because they know the secret: giving means power. What does Google sell? They give away useful programs, server space, e-mail facilities, information, help in tracing facts and fables, pictures, videos, maps, satellite photographs. Because they are so big, advertisers pay them to feature their products and services. They are not so big because so many advertisers pay them, they were big before that. Google is one of the biggest brand names on earth, and I don't notice them advertising in the press. They don't have to: they're powerful.

Wikipedia is the largest information resource in the world. Their 'encyclopedia' is more extensive than the one from Britannica. And all 200 000 plus pages are free to any web user. The influence this company have on minds globally must be immense.

In business advertising we empower often seemingly ignorant customers to make an informed and appropriate choice, because we are also consumers. When we love them enough, we will make sure that clients are happy, that they get more than they pay for. When I feel that I was part of a really good deal, and was treated like the important customer that I am, then I will give my loyalty to that business. I can scarcely wait to use Google's and Wikipedia's services every day. And by doing so, I help build their brand. 

It is when I feel that a business or individual has short changed me that I avoid them and their products, and tell others about my experience with them. We try not to contribute to the success of their businesses. We may even try to undermine them because they treated us with disrespect by thinking that we are fools and would not understand that they were trying to take advantage of us.

Powerful organisations and individuals like Google and Nelson Mandela learned that fear disempowers. Fear of the future induce needy behavior: claiming, hoarding, blaming, entitlement, victimhood. Victims feel that others owe them, that they are dependent on others for security, survival, acceptance. In themselves they feel inadequate and stressed. Stress is the  executive's word for fear.

Power, the result of empowerment, is the exact opposite. The powerful are those who contribute, give, praise, who are masterful of the moment. Powerful leaders know their duty towards others and the environment. They also trust that they are capable and competent to lift others to the same level: that of maturity of emotion and spirit where needs and adequacy meets. Their life has meaning: they know the secret of love.